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The Arresting Rise of the Social Media Police
You type a few sentences, add a link or post a picture and hit SEND. Then the sirens start. WARNING! WARNING! The social media police are stalking you, ready to take you down.
Watch Out!
It was a pretty simple joke. I updated my status on Facebook with what was meant to be a humorous comment, referencing a current event. Tainted, of course, with a little sarcasm. I thought it was harmless and was surprised when a dear old friend took offense to it.
Is there anything at all that isn’t offensive to someone these days?
Social Media is a way for us to connect. We share our thoughts, what we’re doing, our hopes and dreams– we may reach out for support, ask opinions or look for some healthy debate. It’s called sharing. It’s called communication. We use it to keep touch and stay informed — maybe even learn a thing or two.
I’ve found that most posts in social media fall into three categories: I felt this, I did this, and I saw this (and I want to share it).
How is that a bad thing?
Even if you post something that might not be a popular opinion– it’s nothing more than an expression of who you are at that given moment. Doesn’t freedom of speech give you that right?
Is there such a thing as inappropriate content? Of course there is….. BUT Politics, religion, entertainment, current events, family– your life– is completely within your rights to share.
My Opinion
I seriously think there are a lot of people that should not be connected to social media. They aren’t capable of accepting what they find there– or allowing others to exercise their right to free speech. They don’t want to discuss or debate an issue they may disagree with– but they will judge you for posting it.
Do I read, like or comment on everything posted on social media? No, of course not. I do, however, respect the right of people to post it. If I want to engage with people about it, then I will. Most of the time though, people just want to get something off their chest, share a story or state their point of view. They aren’t really looking to have a conversation. That’s okay, too.
On topics I’m not interested in or disagree with — I just scroll on by. If it’s ‘fake news’ or something I feel strongly about, I’ll try to use it as a ‘teaching moment’ and comment. What I will not do, is criticize or state an opposing view that I am not prepared to back up. What would be the point?
That is where the social media police come in.
So exactly who are they?
They are the people that troll online, criticizing people and trying to regulate what they want to see. Don’t even try to please them because they will always find something wrong with your posts.
They are the people that don’t like a specific thing– sports, politics, religion, even cuteness– and issue ultimatums. Usually, that will include the threat that they will delete you or stop following you, if you don’t submit to their demands. They think it is their right to control you.
It becomes difficult when the attacks come from someone you respect, love, work with, or from family. The bottom line is: maybe you (and they) need to stick to other ways to connect. Avoid the rush and get off social media if you can’t handle it.
I’m a political person. Even so, after the above mentioned friend threatened to delete me for my politics, I did a quick look back. Of my past 50+ posts on Facebook, only 10 (20%) had anything to do with current events (not counting entertainment industry posts) and not all of those were even political. For the ‘average’ person– is that too much if that’s what interests them?
Would you tell a mother not to post pictures or stories about their child? Would you tell an actor or musician not to share their work? How about someone fighting cancer or a sports enthusiast? Should they stop posting specific things because you say so? It’s ridiculous.
Sure, I’ve unfollowed some people and even deleted a couple. I’ve never bullied them. At the same time, some of my most favorite people (on social media) are those with whom I have diametrically opposing views on certain issues. Because — we can talk about it, maybe debate it and also even sometimes joke about it. We show respect for one another. I think we enrich each other’s lives because we are open-minded enough to want to learn and understand each other. We’re better people because of it.
Advice to the Would Be Social Media Police
Get off social media!
It’s that simple.
No one has the right to try and control another person. Stop being a bully. You are not the center of the universe. If you don’t like what you see on Facebook or Twitter? Close your account. Shut down your computer. Take a walk. Breathe.
I think if you’re the type of person that just wants to see pictures or cute posts of puppies and food– there are still probably email lists you can sign up for to get your daily dose.
Don’t like what you’re seeing? Your misery and controlling nature doesn’t need to be forced on the rest of us who might actually appreciate the diversity of the world.
Knowledge is power. Acceptance is the key.
If you really don’t like what your friends are posting, maybe you’re just too afraid of learning something new. Or maybe, you really just don’t like your friends.
You decide.
Can You See Me Now? My Facebook Experiment
Last Wednesday was Cash’s 11th birthday and instead of just posting a picture of him on Facebook to share and commemorate the occasion, I decided to try a little experiment.
I decided to mimic those never-ending pictures on Facebook of people holding signs asking for LIKES of help with something, that flooded Facebook for a while.
Background
A lot of my Facebook friends have been complaining about the newsfeed and not seeing current updates from their friends. Have you noticed? It can be confusing when you see posts popping up from the previous day, when you didn’t see them before, even though you checked. Yes, you can switch between top news and most recent. Still, some friends’ posts don’t show up in either one. So what’s going on?
Facebook is supposed to be a way for people to connect and friends to stay in touch. Many people have been sharing important news on Facebook, as their primary form of communication, instead of spending hours making phone calls or sending email. This is especially beneficial when time is an issue, or the news is something that you really don’t want to have to repeat over and over again. Sometimes though, and more frequently now, those posts aren’t showing up. I’ve known people to get hurt or angry because friends didn’t respond, LIKE or comment on their news. They trusted Facebook as a reliable forum to share their news, only to be let down by the current, unpredictable algorithm that is mysteriously sorting what we see.
So how are you supposed to stay in touch when you can’t see what your friends are posting? First, this isn’t entirely true. You can always go to your friends’ page and see everything they are sharing. The problem comes into play when users have many friends and pages they follow and rely on the newsfeed and notifications to keep them informed. That used to be pretty efficient. Now, the wizards at Facebook are controlling what you see and frequently pushing things your way you have no desire to see. Ads and recommended pages and products are here to stay.
Have you also noticed, if you access Facebook from different computers or your phone app, you get different results? The other day a post showed up on my phone from a friend that I hadn’t seen any posts from in awhile. (I had just figured he was busy and taking a break.) Then I saw it had actually been posted a few days before but was showing up now– presumably, because it received new comments. I checked my computer again and it definitely was not showing up in either my newsfeed or notifications. I went to his page and saw he had posted quite a bit, some important stuff– but somehow Facebook decided I shouldn’t see that information. My own family’s posts don’t show up half the time!
On the other hand, there are some people’s posts that never seem to stop. A few I haven’t messaged, LIKED, or commented on, in over a year. Yet, I see everything they do! It just makes no sense.
My personal message to Facebook is : Please, stop censoring what I see. I chose to be friends with these people (or follow a company, group or fan page)… Let me decide if I want to read their content! Just PLEASE stop blocking it and making that decision for me.
Results
Here are the results of my experiment. Realize this isn’t very scientific but it gives you an idea of what all the confusion is about. It might also give to a look into the reach of your audience. The LIKE and SHARED numbers included the measurable friends and friends of friends, viewable on Facebook.
The picture was posted with the PUBLIC setting at approximately 9 am, Wednesday April 23, 2014
My current number of Facebook friends: 873
Number of People that LIKED in the first 10 hours: 248
Number of People that LIKED in the first 24 hours: 465
Number of SHARES in the first 24 hours: 166
Number of LIKES to date (approximately three days): 811
Number of SHARES to date: 711
Number of LIKES from the SHARED List: 1182
Number of Friend SHARES: 16
Number of Friend of Friends SHARES: 215
Number of Friends that said they used Facebook on 4/23 but did not see my original post: 10
As I said, this wasn’t very scientific, so some of the numbers don’t match up. I suspect there could be overlaps and some may not show accurately based on people’s privacy settings.
Another thing I noticed was that it took more than 24 hours for the info to update and combine the totals on the picture. The total number of LIKES and SHARES changed by about 10, as I was writing this.
Favorite SHARED comments from friends of friends (and beyond):
- Awwww… if he won’t give you a steak, just bite him. You need a steak!
- At 77 yrs old who can deny you!
- At 11 you should have steak every night for dinner!
- Omg, I just fed my two doberman’s steak for dinner, and they are no where near 11…bless his heart visit me, I will feed you steak!!!!!!
- Le ne maradjon a steakről!!
- FERST FATWA OF DAYE! YOU SHARE, GET DOG STEAK! IS PERMIT!
- A steak for an 11 year old dog would probably kill his pancreas. (This is a terrible thought… but it made me laugh anyway.)
- If he put up with u for 11 yrs. lol! Buy him a steak any way!!
The last one was my favorite!
From what I can tell, quite a few of my friends never saw the original post. I’m also sure many scrolled right by it without LIKING or SHARING it. In either case, don’t depend that your friends are seeing your posts. I’ve started tagging people in the comment section, or sharing with them directly, if I want to be sure they see it.
And YES, Cash got his steak.
DELETE ME… Please!
In case some people didn’t get the memo… Facebook is a social networking site. It is a place where people can choose their friends based on shared interests, backgrounds and real life relationships. A social networking site allows users to share interests, ideas, events and yes, even what they ate for dinner. You can join groups, follow artists and businesses and make connections in ways that would otherwise be nearly impossible for most people. It is not a site for censorship. It is a site for shared experiences.
FRIEND as defined by Merriam-Webster
1 a : one attached to another by affection or esteem
b : acquaintance
2 a : one that is not hostile
b : one that is of the same nation, party, or group
3 : one that favors or promotes something (as a charity)
4 : a favored companion
The other day a friend bitched at me about one of my posts on Facebook.
Seriously? Do you really think your 500 ‘cute kitty’ posts don’t annoy anyone?
Honestly, I don’t really care. It is what it is. You can post whatever you what, whenever you want… and you can post it as many times as you want. It doesn’t affect me. I can choose to read it, ‘hide’ it, ‘LIKE’ it and if I really agree or disagree with you– I can comment on it and we might actually have a social engagement, once referred to as a conversation about it. But– I’m not going to try and censor you and you shouldn’t try and censor me. Our society has an increasing difficulty communicating these days. If you don’t want to engage your friends is conversation, sharing your thoughts and ideas, or to be engaged– why are you on Facebook?
The last time I checked, we still have freedom of speech in this country. People are going to talk about current events, politics, things that make them laugh and things that make them sad. If you are going to use social networking sites: Deal with it! Yes, during the presidential debates, Hurricane Sandy, the playoffs… the News Feed is going to be clogged with posts by people who are engaged by these activities and events. There’s a reason there are settings and controls that allow you to adjust what and how you view content. If you continually get annoyed and are not computer literate enough to know how to adjust your settings: Maybe social networking isn’t for you.
There’s another option. It’s called the DELETE button.
Don’t like what I have to say? Delete Me. Do I post too much? Delete Me. Are you incapable of entertaining a viewpoint that is different from your own or so intolerant that what I say makes your blood boil? Delete Me. Please.
If you only want to engage with people that look like you, sound like you, talk like you and think like you… You might want to invest in a cocoon. ‘Cause, baby– there ain’t no one else in the world like you. You are unique. We all are. Social networking gives us the opportunity to share our unique perspectives with people all around the world.
Think about it– it’s pretty amazing. What I’m talking about in Elgin, Illinois might actually have some relevance to someone in New York City, London or Zambia. You or I might actually have something to say that can impact someone’s life on the opposite side of the globe.
But not if you hit DELETE, and not if you live in a cocoon.
That’s just my opinion.
How Do You Measure 525600 Minutes? 